It has been a little over a week since I’ve written. We went down to N. Carolina to find a builder for my dream home and then onto S. Carolina to visit with friends. I would like to write while I’m gone but I don’t want to bring my laptop. I could write passages in Pages on my iPad and then just copy into blog when I get back. I actually started this blog on my iPad until I found out it would be better on my laptop. Anyway I would like to write when I’m feeling things and as they are happening, rather than, like now, trying to remember things. The other problem I have is not having any time to myself when we are away. When you go places with my husband you have to optimize every spare minute. He really does not understand 1) I get tired and need to rest, and 2) I need time by myself regardless of where we are.
Our trip down was great, 4 1/2 hours with no backups instead of 6 – 7 hours up North with multiple backups. The first two days I was able to go everywhere with my walker. Didn’t use the wheelchair at all. I felt good. We went out to dinner at the “Oceanic,” right on the pier at Wrightsville Beach. It was my request as I got to see the ocean. Sitting outside and watching families on the beach brought back such wonderful memories. I took my kids to Wildwood, NJ every year when they were growing up. I saw little boys and girls running with their moms close behind, I saw families flying kites and playing frisbee. These are all things we did. I can’t help but feel sad as I was reminiscing. The inability to walk on the sand bothers me, its one of my all time favorite thing to do.
The second day we looked at homes and met with builders. It was overwhelming and exhausting. I had called a childhood friend and brother of a good friend Mary from high school. Rick and his wife were living in Wilmington and I asked if they could meet us for dinner. They did and we met at one of my favorite restaurants, ” Indochine”, (Thai). We had such a great evening and talked about getting together often when we move down!
Now I’ll address the problems with the hotel room(s). It happens at all of them. I don’t get a handicapped room because I don’t need a roll in shower and feel I would be taking it away from someone who needs it. I would like just a shower with no bathtub, which we only found once. We bring the shower seat but now the tubs are too small. The problem for me is that when showering in a tub/shower combination, I need help lifting my legs over the sides of the tub. I don’t want help. I don’t even want my husband to see me naked. I’ve gained so much weight, all in my gut and thighs. Going to the bathroom is always a challenge when there are no safety bars. I have to make sure there are things I can hold on to get up and down on the toilet. This particular room was the smallest room I’ve ever been in. It had a king size bed, no sink other than the bathroom, no microwave and no toiletries. I am tired of every move being a challenge. I might start requesting the handicapped room.
By the third day my legs weren’t cooperating and had to use the wheelchair. We went to a favorite store, (stores) of mine, The Ivy’s. They are three buildings filled with consignments, very good quality stuff organized. A great place to buy unique beautiful things and I can’t wait to decorate with finds from their stores. The wheelchair wasn’t good for these stores as the aisles are very thin so I had to use the walker. It was hard, I was pushing myself. My husband loses patience and sometimes talks to me like I’m a child, telling me what to do, and asking why I’m doing something a certain way and telling me how I should be doing it. I feel it belittles me and I found myself in tears because of it. I NEVER CRY! That was a surprise to me. Sometimes I have a hard time doing things. Left alone, I will figure it out. If I want help I will ask for it. I think he finally got it because after that he was nicer.
We met with the management of Brunswick Forest and drove past our property and down to where the kayak launch is. On our way back, still in the development, I saw what looked like an alligator sunning himself next to one of the many ponds. Well it was an alligator! Our property is on one of those ponds. I didn’t know alligators were in N. Carolina. We were told that the storms brought them there and they made do with the miles and miles of ponds and manmade waterways. They travel from pond to pond through the large pipes. Good to know. I had also called the woman who lives next door to our property and is from Long Island, NY. She was extremely friendly and really wanted to meet us and show us her home. Unfortunately it was a bad timing as she was traveling to Ohio to spend Easter with her son. Another possible friend.
We traveled to S. Carolina to visit friends in Merrill’s Inlet. An ordinary hour and a half ride took us about four because we wanted to check out the other beaches on our way down. We went through Carolina Beach, Kure Beach, Sunset Beach and took the Southport ferry which was about 45 minutes on the water with our car. We drove through Oak Island and tried to find a place to eat, it was Easter after all. We got to their house around 4 and went out to dinner, Italian. Delicious! We spent two nights with them and went to some antique malls, and down to the beach there. We had a wonderful time with them and learned how to play Dominoes. I only knew dominoes as black tiles with dots that you line up in intricate paths and then proceed to knock them down. Anyway this wasn’t that and we had fun. Again we planned on weekend getaways when we move down. More friends.