I should mention that I tend to see things in black and white, I constantly have to be reminded that nothing is that simple.

I was back at therapy with Katy. I told her about the trip and seeing Sister Marion, (1/4/26 post, “Back in VA”). About my hatred for the president and what she said. I also told her about my resentment for Pete’s mother. We discussed how all these negative thoughts don’t change anything and ways to redirect my energy. If there is nothing I can do about the president or his mother, basically suck it up. When asked about why I felt that way about his mother, I replied how she blindly follows Fox News. Has no desire to hear anything else, her ignorance. Anyway for the amount of time I see her, (about twice a year). I need to accept her. I can’t change her mind so there is no point holding on to this resentment. Makes perfect sense. It’s easier said than done.

I have other reasons too, like how his family barely acknowledges Brylee, yet Pete is for all purposes her grandfather. No gift when she was born, nothing. Wait until his brother and sister have grandchildren. This is what I mean about hypocritical Catholics. No open hearts. Plus, Pete’s side of the family is so “perfect.” Makes me sick. No drama with his brothers family. Stan is mister know it all, sound familiar? You can’t have a conversation because he knows everything and tells you in a very condescending way. His wife Ann, who I like is perfect. His three son’s are perfect. I don’t resent them or Ann. It’s hard being around them when my family is so dysfunctional. Again, that’s on me. As Elsa says, “Let it Go.”

We discussed Mel Robin’s new book, “The Let Them Theory.” I actually brought this up at our last session when she gave me the poem of “Letting Go.” She disregarded me when I mentioned it. Maybe her mind was on what she was giving me. I will be getting that book.

I brought up the fact that no matter how long I’ve had MS, I’ll never get over it. How I constantly look at how I was. This was discussed as far as going away. Pete is in Europe again, France, Brussels and somewhere else. Again resentment because I haven’t been anywhere, on a plane, in over 10 years. The old me would have called a friend and gone away, no hesitation. I’ve done it, when I went to Italy. She asked me what’s stopping me now? Good question. I made excuses, too hard by myself, I don’t like asking for help, etc. She called me on it. There’s really no reason I can’t plan a trip with my friend, Sharon. We both would like to go to Nashville. I said that Pete wants to go to Nashville too, but he would want to drive. I would also have more fun with Sharon. What to do????

I do get a lot from coming here.